1.01.2011

When You Know Better, You Do Better

How do you cope with the fact that you are doing things different for your second or third babies that you didn't do, or even know to do, with your first. I wanted a homebirth when I had K Bean but was too scared and too uneducated to trust myself and do it. So my daughter was brought into this world with much tugging and poking and prodding. No major drugs or surgery but it was hardly the peaceful beginning of life I had wanted for her. When we found out we were going to have a second baby, we both new we would have him at home. And we did. I thought that babies could manipulate you into thinking that they needed to be held all the time so we let the bean cry it out at bed time. Now I know better so my Man Child sleeps in bed with me so we can nurse all night long. Whenever he wants. We started giving the Bean solid food as soon as she could sit up, she weaned hella early, around 14 months. I had wanted to nurse her for at least 2 years. So now I know, Man Child will not be getting solid foods until he is no longer gaining on breast milk only. We never researched disipline with K Bean and we have both found our selves so frustrated with her that we have both smacked her, and felt so guilty about it afterwards... so now, I am doing non-stop reading so we can find an alternative to what we grew up with. 
On the flip side, Bean was never around when we were watching TV or checking e-mail. She didn't see any movies or other electronic media unless we were visiting my moms house. She didn't watch movies until we were pregnant with Man Child. But now, both she and Man Child get to see movies on the computer screen way too often. Well, too often in my opinion... Wade-O doesn't really seem to think it is so bad. But he grew up in cities, with not much green. I grew up with no TV, deep in the woods, lots of green. Just 2 ways of living...
So how do I learn to do things better for each subsequent child while applying these lessons to the children you already have? How do I make up to K Bean for her birth experience and short term nursing? 

1 comment:

.:The McGuire's:. said...

What discipline books do you recommend?