...but I don't feel like looking back...
It is amazing what I can hear when I listen.
My poor girl was just trying to tell me something and instead of listening, I blew up. If I had just slowed my roll, you know? taken the time to cool off- I would have heard her. So because I will not let that moment go, we have had a great weekend and learned a few things on the way.
She just wants Me. She wants me to put the baby down and turn off the computer and play. Stop telling her what to do and do it with her. Turns out that if we do things together... at the same time... we get things done a lot faster! For instance, getting dressed. We put our socks on at the same time, and pants, and shirts and so on. If I sit on the floor and toss things into the toy box with her, it is more fun and a lot less shouting! AND it is all about bed time with her. When I just put her in bed and lay down with the Man Child she wakes up all pissy and mad at the world. But, since Wade-O is still gone, I have moved her into the side car crib to sleep next to me. She usually watches a short little movie on Netflix while I nurse Man Child to sleep. When he is finally asleep we brush our teeth together and sit in the living room for 1 or 2 stories before moving to the bed for a few more. When KaBean was new to this world I read tot her all the time. No matter what was going on I always had a book to read to her from. But as she got bigger and then the new baby came, the reading slowed to a bare trickle. Now it is my mission to read to her all the time and never turn her down when she wants a story. So last night while we were laying in bed after we read 4 full length Dr. Suess books and she still wasn't sleepy, I started telling her made up stories. About Molly Monstah and her best friend, a princess with the magical ability to make plants grow. After about 3 or 4 or 5 of these, she finally fell asleep holding my hand... really though she some how got a hold of my whole arm and drooled on it.
I guess the thing is no matter what kind of mood or emotional state we may find ourselves our children at least deserve the effort of calming down. We can always vent and be angry after they go to bed.
And so now I listen. And 2 days and the start of a 3rd have come and gone quite nicely...
2 comments:
great stuff Kat, sounds like it's all starting to come together for you. It's great when the shock of a crisis (the screaming and hitting lately) can lead to genuine change. I can hear that you're really taking responsibility and getting back into the groove you had before man child was born. Beautiful! And so satisfying for you too.
Wow, you are doing a great job! Thanks for the blog. How did you start this page?
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